Baby Sullie: the first few days of my pregnancy

I started a little diary when I first found out I was pregnant.... I was bursting not telling anyone so I wrote down some of my thoughts:

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

I woke up this morning excited to retake the pregnancy test. It had been three days since I received a negative result but I had read to take one 3 days later – and I just had a feeling. I took the test, and sure enough, the faintest vertical line appeared on the test. All the cute ideas I ever imagined of how I'd tell Luke did not even enter my mind when I yelled to a peacefully sleeping husband: “LUUKKKEEEEE!”, as I ran into the bedroom with the test and as he, still half asleep, woke up alert to my cry. “I’m pregnant!” I yelled as I jumped into the bed. With tears in our eyes we both stared at each other, incredulous that this was happening. We both laughed as we tried to squint to see the faint little line that was growing darker by the second.  “It’s faint, but it’s definitely positive,” I said. Later Luke told me he was wondering what I’d done that warranted my yelling, perhaps I had I had dropped something else down the sink, he thought.

I felt like my mind was only half at work.. I had a few meetings at out Boston location and had lunch with co-workers. Out to lunch I wondered.. can I eat that? I had a soy latte, but decided I’m going to give up coffee until at least the second trimester. When I got home that evening, I took another test just to be sure. Again, the line was faint but it reconfirmed a positive pregnancy. That night I woke in the middle of the night with a shooting pain where I imagine my uterus is. The same thing happened on Monday night too. Sunday night was very bad heartburn  - all really weird because that never usually happens to me.

Wednesday, February 18^th, 2015

Wednesday afternoon I had a doctor’s appointment. I told the Dr. my original appt was that I wasn’t getting me period after coming off the pill, but that yesterday I woke up with a positive pregnancy test! I talked to the dr for a little while. She said that the pains I was having in the middle of the night were ‘implantation’! She also said it was ok that I had a few drinks before I knew I was pregnant, I was very nervous about that. I did another pee test and I heard her call for the nurse. She said at first she didn’t see anything and was about to tell me it was negative when she too saw a very faint line. She showed it to me and said it was darkening and yup, I was pregnant! Even then, it didn’t feel real for some reason! She had me do a blood test but I was disappointed to know that I wouldn’t get those results until tomorrow AM!

I spent the whole rest of the night and some time at work too, researching and researching everything I could find… what to eat, a timeline of the baby’s development, plotting out at which point I’ll be so far along, EVERYTHING! My head was swimming with information!

Thursday, February 19^th, 2015

I called right at 8 AM but they didn’t open until 8:30 – calling at 8:30 I found out the results wouldn’t be in until 4:30! I FINALLY called back at 4:30 PM and the nurse said “It’s positive, you’re pregnant!” THEN it felt real. My hormone level was 200-something, the Dr. said anything over 5 meant I was pregnant. I went home shortly after, leaving work early, and told Luke the final confirmation.  I think that hit him then too… he kept saying “ahh” and  “this is so werd!”.

Friday, February 20^th, 2015

A luncheon today for Susie at work, who is getting married – we were talking about getting pregnant and babies and how it changes your world and my head was spinning a bit. I woke up feeling sort of sick and then felt sick again after I ate lunch (maybe it was all the talking about babies!). 

 I’m not sure I’m feeling how I thought I would feel, I’m not nervous but I instantly feel like my life has changed. I still can’t decide how or when to tell our families – should we do it now since we are so excited and it’s going to be so hard to keep this big of a secret in? or should we wait a little bit and enjoy this secret for ourselves for a little longer. I am only 5 weeks… I’m leaning towards waiting a little longer. I have dinner tonight with the girls,  it’s going to be SO hard not to tell them. I haven’t seen my Mom, Ron or Kerry yet – I feel like when I see them I’m going to burst it out. Amanda, Syd, and Hayley too! I keep looking up when other people decided to tell people, but I know it has to be what’s right for us. I just know that we can’t take back that moment and it’s going to be awesome telling them, that I want to delay for as long as possible. We were originally thinking Easter at our house (exactly 3 months) but NO WAY can we hold out that long.

SO tired at work today… 

Later that evening I had dinner plans with the girls. We were going to Sam Diego's so I got there super early to tell the waitress to bring me virgin margaritas- sort of funny she was the first person I told! I even got salt on it, so Jamie wouldn't try it haha! I got so tired from not drinking towards the end of the night.